Two Tickets to Paradise

Last week, I had a friend tell me that my life is like an episode of “Seinfeld.”

To which I replied that, no, it’s not like one at all.

It IS one.

Funny things just happen to me. And anyone who knows me also knows I have a story for every occasion (probably two stories). My world isn’t quite as small as it used to be when I was a newspaper columnist, but can still probably about fit inside a thimble.

So many unexpected things have happened to me over the years that, well, I’ve come to expect them.

But, nevertheless, I still was caught off guard a few weeks ago when I decided to test out the new Google Street View option on my iPhone.

Street View — a feature of Google Maps and Google Earth that provides 360° horizontal and 290° vertical panoramic street level views of numerous cities and regions — has been around for a couple years, but before the iPhone addition, I’d never tinkered with it before.

I had, however, heard about Street View’s controversy, as privacy advocates have objected to the Google feature since it’s been found to show, among other things, men leaving strip clubs or picking up prostitutes, people sunbathing in skimpy outfits and parents smacking around their kids.

Now, Google Street View didn’t catch me doing any of those things.

I don’t even have kids.

(Kidding, I’m kidding …)

But, in Chicago, I do break the law a lot. Or, at least, that’s what city’s Department of Revenue tells me (don’t get me started).

Because, since I moved to town in July 2005, their officers have slapped a whopping 15 tickets on my poor car. So, of course, it was only natural that when I typed my address into Google Street View that it returned an image featuring my car parked directly outside my building.

With not one ticket plastered on the passenger’s side window.

But two.

Heck, even George Costanza couldn’t top that.

(To see my Street View, click on the image below. My 7 1/2-year-old car’s the black one — wearing the tickets. )


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